好汉两个半第五季Two and a Half Men中英剧本Word文档格式.docx

1、 What else could it be?既然说的是你的私密部位 Well, since were talking about your private area那就啥都可能 埃博拉病毒啊 疯牛病啊 it could anything from ebola to mad cow disease.猴子能传染埃博拉病毒 对吧? You get ebola from monkeys, right?对 Right.只不过是疹子罢了 Its just a rash.学校里有个孩子得了汗屁股 猫在他身后跟了 一年 A kid at school got swamp ass.Catsfollowed h

2、im around for a year.得了 还是忘了吧 You know what?Lets just forget about it.喔 那也得忘的掉 Oh, if only we could.说起学校 咱们马上要迎来大日子了 Speaking of school, weve got a big day ahead of us.得去买日用品 衣服 Weve got to go shopping for supplies, clothes.话题转移的不错 老爸 Nice segue, dad.话题巴不得想转移呢 Well, the subject was crying out for ch

3、ange.不管怎么说 你要去新学校了 Anyway, youre starting a new school.需要新东西嘛 Youre gonna need new stuff.等等 西瓜头升上初中了? Wait a sec.Melonhead made it into junior high?对 Yes.暑期学校考试合格了? So you passed summer school?差不多吧 Sort of.什么叫差不多? What do you mean, sort of他们说 要是我继续读初中 对大家都有好处 They said it was in everyones best inter

4、est if Imoved on.那算什么意思?s that supposed to mean?他们提拔他呀 It means they promoted him.他就要上初中了 问啥都没有意义 Hes starting junior high, and theres absolutely nothing tobe gained in asking how or why.行 管它呢 真为你骄傲 小子 Okay, well, whatever.Im proud of you, man.骄傲啥? For what?我也不知道 一直撑到大伙儿都讨厌你 I dont know.Hanging in t

5、here until they were sick ofyou.谢了 Thanks.嗯. 初中 哈? So.junior high, huh?倒是有很多美好回忆啊 对吧 艾伦? Boy, that brings back some memories, doesnt it, alan?拜托能别往下说了吗? Can we please not go down that road?到底是什么事儿? What happened?只不过是. Its just that.中学里的孩子喜欢批评人 kids in junior high can be a little judgmental.尤其是被搞大肚子以

6、后 Especially if youre knocked up.谢谢噢 贝塔 Thank you, berta.当然了 从好的方面来看 Of course, on the up side大肚子的妞儿 就用不着上体育课了 pregnant chicks didnt have to go to gym.就不体谅体谅 搞大她们 肚子的 家 伙? Did the guys who got em pregnant got anyconsiderations?不行 想也别想 No, not even a hall pass.咱们到底说完没有? Are we quite done?你会明白的 事情会一切顺

7、利 只需要记住几件事儿 Youll see.Things will go great for you.Youjust have to remember a few things.比如? Like what?嗯 Well.把午餐钱藏在鞋子里 但口袋里也得放几个子儿 always keep your lunch money in your shoebut have some spare change in your pocket.此话怎讲? 当作诱饵嘛 How come? Decoy money.他们不拿到点什么 是不会罢休的 They wont stop hitting you till the

8、y get something.他们是谁? Who are they那些大孩子 会拎着你脚踝 把你的头摁到厕所里 The big kids holding you by your ankles andplunging your head in the toilet.把我的头摁到厕所里? Plungingy head in the toilet?别 别 别吓坏孩子了 艾伦 Dont, dont freak the kid out, alan.不算是摁 也就是浸一下 Its not so much plunging as dipping.你得这么办 Heres what you do.跟看门人搞好

9、关系 Make friends with the janitor.他们都有单独卫生间 They usually have their own bathroom.好吧 Okay.就是千万别喝他水壶里的东西 Just never drink out of his thermos.明白 All right.要是他说他爱你 千万别信 And dont believe him if he tells you he loves you.该死 真怀念那个独眼儿杂种 Damn it, I miss that oneeyed son of a bitch.对了 要是上完体育课要洗澡 Oh, oh, and if

10、 you have to shower after gym class记住 穿着短裤洗 也不是那么丢人 remember, there is no shame in keeping your jockey shortson.真的? Really?好吧 是有点丢人 Okay, theres a little shame.不过关键是 大伙儿就不会叫你缩小的鸡鸡了 But the important thing is the fellows wontbe calling you shrinky dink. Shrinky dink?不鸣则矣 一鸣惊人 Im a grower, not a showe

11、r.噢 我差点忘了 Oh, I almost forgot.我给你买了个小礼物 I got you a little present.你的私人手机哦 Your very own cell phone.好棒 Oh, cool.重要的是要记住 这不是玩具 The important thing to remember is this is not a toy.只能在紧急情况下使用 Its to use in emergencies only.紧急情况 什么紧急情况? Emergencies?What emergencies?爸爸 快来救我! Dad, come get me!我被关在我的储物柜里了

12、 内裤也湿了! Im stuffed in my locker and my underwear is wet!那种情况就发生过一次 That only happened once.如果不是那些缉毒犬找到了你 你就把感恩节错过了 If that drugsniffing dog hadnt found you,youd have missed thanksgiving.缉毒犬? Drugsniffing dog?没有 没有毒品 There were no, there were no drugs.没错 是因为那些狗对尿味也很敏感 Thats true.Turns out those dogs

13、are also sensitive tourine.我在那里呆了五个小时 I was in there for five hours.五个小时? Five hours?但你不需要担心这个 But you dont have to worry about that.你有手机 You have a cell phone.你应该把手机藏在 战俘藏手表的地方 Which you should hide where prisoners of war hid theirwatches.在哪里? 还没说完 Where was that? Moving on.我已经设置好了 Ive preprogramme

14、d the phone.快速拨号 1 是我 2 是医务室 Speed dial one is me, speed dial two is the nurses office3 则是警察 and speed dial three is the police.警察? 要来干嘛? The police?What for?到时你就知道了 Youll know it when it happens.关于种族骚动 Now, about race riots.要保持中立 Try not to taksie des.要是有人问起 你就说自己是黑白混血 If anybody asks, youre mulatt

15、o.好汉两个半:第 5 季第 1 集 后期:wqswqswswqs two.and.a.half.men.Season5 Episode01感觉如何? how do they feel?还行 但好丑 像老人鞋 Okay, but theyre ugly.They look likeold people shoes.这不是老人鞋 是步行鞋 Theyre not old people shoes.Theyre walking shoes.没错 对于一个步行 85 年的人来说 的确如此 Right, for peoplewhove been walking over 85years.我想要这对 这对

16、酷 Id rather get these.These are cool.听着杰克 高中生买鞋不讲究酷和流行 Listen, jake,junior high is not about being cool orpopular.而是讲究会否因其而被敲诈 Its about not getting mugged for your sneakers.我会因穿着的鞋而被敲诈? I can get mugged for my sneakers?这对就不会 Not those sneakers.要是你再拄根拐杖走在贫民窟 就不一定了 No, not unless you go walking by an

17、 assisted livingfacility in a rough neighborhood.你干什么? What are you doing?对不起 这皮疹痒死了 Sorry, this rash is driving me crazy.穿这对很傻 I feel stupid in these.当高年级孩子把你光脚丫 绑在旗杆 上吐口水时 Better to feel stupid than to betied toflagpole barefoot你会觉得更傻 while upperclassmen use you as a spittoon.我不要被绑在旗杆上 I dont want

18、 to be tied to a flagpole.你不会的 只要你穿着这对丑鞋 还有吃饭时别坐错桌子就对了 You wont be.Just wear theugly shoes and dont sit at the wrong lunch table.坐错桌子? Wrong table?我怎么知道有没坐错? How will I know if its the wrong table?看来你要被绑在旗杆上了 对吗 艾伦? Youll be tied to a flagpole, right, alan?只是一次而已 That also only happened once.看看合不合适

19、Lets just check the fit.很好 足够用来藏午饭钱 Ooh, good. Plenty of room for lunch money.为什么校服一定要米黄色? how come all my school clothes have to beige?因为现在已知的黑帮 没有一个是穿米黄色的 Because beige is not the color of any knowngang.没错 你不会被错当作是瘸子或血块 Right, so instead of being mistaken for a crip or a blood但会被误认为一块巨型邦迪 youll be

20、 mistaken for a very large bandaid.至少贴邦迪不会痛 （被打会痛） Hey, bandaids are ouchless.对不起 不好意思 请排队 Oh, oh, excuse me,excuse me. Theres a line.我知道 我只是买了两件东西 Yeah, I just got a couple things.我看得见 但这似乎不是数量问题 Well, I can see that, but its not really based on quantity ofitems.而是我们先来的问题 Its more of a wewereherebe

21、foreyou kind of deal.你准备采取什么行动吗? you gonna make a thing out of this?也没有什么行动 Theres no thing.我只是遵守秩序 要是每个人都能这样不是很好吗?m just, uh, just playing by the rules andwouldnt it be nice if everybody did the same?拿着 小滑头 Hang onto this, slick.你能再给我说说那些秩序吗 SB? Now, you want to explain those rules again, jughead?要

22、是你真的那么急 我就让你好了 You know what?If youre in such a big hurry, why dont youjust go ahead?谢谢 Thank you.搞什么鬼? What the hell are you doing?没什么 给 Nothing.Here.* *我不是胆小 这是起码社会公德 暴力解决不了问题 no, no, not chicken, just good commonsense.Fighting accomplishes nothing.我真不知道你原来那么绅士 Oh, I didnt know you were so french.

23、嘿 嘿 Julie Hey. Oh, hey, julie.你怎会认识我老婆? how do you know my wife?什么? 不 不 不 我.我不认识她 What?Oh, no, no, no.III dont know her.你说 嘿 Julie You said, hey, julie.不.不 我.我打喷嚏而已 Nno, no.III sneezed.Ay.chooie!为你的健康干杯! （德语祝酒辞 对打喷嚏的人祝愿） 谢谢 Gesundheit. Thank you.看 这边也可以结帐 走吧 走吧 走吧 Oh, look, another cashier opened up

24、.Lets go, lets go,lets go.但妈妈说我可以自己等公车 but mom said I could wait for the bus by myself.我知道 I know.我真的一个人就好了 I would really rather wait for the bus by myself.我只是想确保你平安出发 I just want to make sure you get off okay.但是由爸爸叔叔送去坐公车? Yeah, but being walked to the bus stop by my dad and my uncle?我会显得很逊 Im gon

25、na look so lame.杰克 伙计 覆水难收了 Jake, buddy, that ship has sailed.拜托别走 please dont leave me.没事的 Youre okay.避免眼神接触 Just dont make eye contact.车来时 不要靠窗坐 Okay, when the bus comes, dont take a window seat.不然就要被某个二流子 逼在角落里猛揍 You dont want to be trapped by one of thesemouthbreathers and get pummeled.猛揍? 还有对司机

26、要礼貌 Pummeled? And be polite to the bus driver.他们一点火就会受刺激变脸成恶人 They tend to be damaged people with short fuses.点火? Fuses?别瞎指点他 Dont distract him.这些旧公车上没安全带 Theres no seatbelts on these old buses.一个急转 里面的小孩会像 摇奖机里的球一样飞起来 One sharp turn, and all you kids will beflying around like lotto balls.球? Balls?对

27、了 等等. oh, uh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.笑一个 为什么而笑? Smile. About what?你要是弄丢了 我需要一张近照 I need a current picture in case you go missing.艾伦 你太夸张了 Alan, youre being ridiculous.丢了的孩子从来没被找回过 They never find those kids.侧面来张 Give me a profile.好了 开开心心上学去吧 Okay, now go and make it a great day.玩开心点 Have fun.我

28、只是希望一切按部就班 I just hope everything turns out all right.我们已经尽力了 Well, weve done all we could.现在看他了 Now its up to him.好的 好的 你告诉医生假设我是一棵树 okay, okay, tell the doctor that if I was a tree那么皮疹已经攻占了 布满毛苔的树干部分 the rash is predominantly around the mossy trunkarea.而且附近的鹅卵石 貌似也开始发红 But Im starting to see some redness on the adjacentboulders.不会吧从树到鹅卵石 Oh, come on.E?Tre two boulders你