Unit4.docx

Unit4.docx

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Unit4

UnitFour:

TheNo-childFamily:

GoingAgainst100,000YearsofBiology

RitaKramer

Introduction:

Withthedevelopmentofacommercializedsociety,somepeoplehavedecidedtoremainsingle,andmoreandmoremarriedcoupleshavedecidednottohaveanychildren.Thereasonsseemtobemany-sided.Oneofreasonsseeminglyliesinthepressuresofmodernworkandlife.Conventionalistsarguethat"generationfacesseriousquestionsaboutthecontinuityoflifeandaswellasitsquality",so"itisselfishtostaychildlessaftermarriage,andthat“theno-childfamilyflyinthefaceofbiologyandsociety.”Wehavealsonoticedthatinacommercialsociety,manymendriftintotheparenthood.Dotheyhavetomakeavirtueoutofnecessitytorearachildevenwhendon'twantto?

1）       CathyandWayneN.areintheirlate20'shavebeenmarriedfiveyears,andarechildless.ThelasttimeamemberofCathy'sfamilyasked,“whenareyougoingtostartafamily?

”Heranswerwas"Weareafamily!

"

2） CathyandWaynebelongtoagrowingnumberofyoungmarriedcoupleswhoaredecidingnottohavechildren.Arecentsurveyshowedthatinthelastfiveyearsthepercentageofwivesaged25to29whodidnotwantchildrenhadalmostdoubledandamongthose18to24ithadalmosttripled.Whatliesbehindthisdecisionwhichseemstoflyinthefaceofbiologyandsociety?

3）       PerhapsthemostpublicoutspokenchildlesscoupleareEllenPeck,authorofTheBabyTrap,andherhusband,William,anadvertisingexecutivewhoispresidentoftheNationalOrganizationforNon-parents.ThePecksinsistneithertheynortheorganizationisagainstparenthood,justagainstthesocialpressuresthatpushpeopleintoparenthoodwhetheritiswhattheyreallywantandneedornot.

4）       "It'salife-stylechoice,"Ellensays.“Wechosefreedomandspontaneity,privacyandleisure.It'salsoaquestionofwhereyouwanttogiveyourefforts–withinyourownfamilyorinthelargercommunity.Thisgenerationfacesseriousquestionsaboutthecontinuityoflifeandaswellasitsquality.Ourgrandchildrenmayhavetobuyticketstoseethelastredwoodsorlineuptogettheiroxygenration.Therearemenwhocomplainaboutbeingcaughtinatrafficjamforhoursontheirhometotheirfivekidsbutcan'tmaketheassociationbetweenthechildrenandthetrafficjam.Inaworldseriouslythreatenedbytheconsequencesofoverpopulationwe'reconcernedwithmakinglifewithoutchildrenacceptanceandrespectable.Toomanychildrenarebornasaresultofculturalcoercion.Andtheresultsshowupinthestatisticsondivorceandchild-abuse.”

5）       Herhusbandadds,“Everyfriend,relativeandbusinessassociateispressuringyoutohavekids'andfindwhatyou'remissing.'Toomanypeoplediscovertoolatethatwhattheyweremissingwassomethingtheyweretotallyunsuitedfor.”

6）       AndEllenagain:

“Fromthefirstdolltosoapoperastococktailparties,thepressureoralwaystheretobeparents.Butlet'stakealookattherateofparentalfailure.Perhapsparenthoodshouldberegardedasaspecializedoccupationlikebeingadoctor.Somepeoplearegoodatitandtheyshouldhavechildren;otheraren't,andtheyshouldfeeltheyhaveotheralternatives.”

 7）       Professionalobserversagreethatmanypeoplehavechildrenforthewrongreason,somethingfornoreasonatall.Menoftendriftintofatherhoodwithoutevermakingadeliberatechoice.Formanywomenpregnancycanbeawaytoescapefromunresolvedconflicts,toachieveinstantidentityorstrengthenapoorself-image,togratifyaneedfortheattentionandaffectiontheyfeeltheyneverhadaschildren.

8）       Italkedwithanumberofspecialistsinthefieldofhumanbehavioraboutwhymanyyoungmarriedcouplesdecidenottohavechildren.Theirreactionsvariedwidely.Afamilytherapistdescribedthedecisionnottohavechildrenas“abasicinstinctualresponsetotheworldsituationtoday,”implyingthatsomethingliketheherdinstinctinanimalswasoperatingasaresponsetothedangersofover-population,crowding,pollutionandnuclearwar,causingwomentofeelareluctancetoreproduceandleadingthemtoseeknewwaysofrealizingthemselvesoutsideoffamilylife.

9）       Morethanonepsychiatristsuggestedthatthosewhowanttoremainchildlessarenarcissistic–makingavirtueoutofnecessitybyrationalizingtheirinnerconflictaboutgivingcarevs.beingtakencareof.“Therearepeoplewhocan'ttoleratetheideaofcaringforchildren,whohavenomarginoflovetosparethem,”saidone,adding,“You'regoingagainstsomethingwith100,000yearsofbiologybehindit.”Acolleagueofhischimedin,“well,weallrationalizeourdeficits,andthesepeopleprobablyshouldn’thavechildrenwhatevertheirrealmotivesare,forthesamereasonthereoughttobeliberalabortionlaw.Thereshouldonlybeenthusiasticparentsinthisworld.”

 10）    PsychologistDonaldM.Kaplanbelievesthatwhilesomepeoplehavealwaysoptednottohavechildren,theincreasedfrequencyweareseeingisinthosechildrenofthenineteen-fortiesandfiftieswhowereraisedbyparentswhosecharacterstylehadshiftedfromwhatsociologistDavidRisesmancalled“inner-directed”to“other-directed,”andthattheseother-directedparentshadtworelevanteffectsontheirchildren.Onewastogivethemagreaterfeelingof"narcissisticentitlement"fromlife-----.Theotherwasthelossofasenseofcertainty.Theyaremoreopentoself-doubt,hesays,morepreoccupiedwiththeirbodies,theirlife-styles,lessabletomaintainstableattachmenttoothers.Thedecisiontohaveababy,hethinks,isthekindofdecisionsuchpeoplemightbemostlikelytopostpone.Itcan'tbemodified,can'tbeundone.

11）    “Manyoftheseyoungadultsareambivalentaboutrelinquishingtheroleoftheonewhoiscaredforandtakingonthatoftheonewhodoesthecaring,”saysDr.Kaplan.

12）    Dr.E.JamesAnthonyisprofessorofchildpsychiatryatWashingtonUniversitySchoolofMedicineandco-authorof“Parenthood,itsPsychologyandPsychopathology.”InarecentconversationDr.Anthonysaid,“ManypeopleI’vetalkedtoareveryconcernedabouttheirownfutureandthefutureofchildreninthisrathertroubledworld.Inthepasttherewasalwaysafeelingimplicitintheculturethatparenthoodwassomethingverysignificant,attractive,enriching,creative.Nowitseemstobegoingbytheboard.Thereseemtobesomanyotheropportunitiesforwomentoexpressthemselvescreativelyandfamilyliferequiresthemtogiveupsomanythingsthattheemphasisonfamilyoftheworld,doesn'treallyringabellwithmanyyoungpeople.”

13）    “Ithinkthatpartofwhat'shappeningisthattheambivalenceofparentstodayisbeingpassedonunconsciouslytotheirchildren.Childrenareagreatdealoftrouble,andperhapsmoresotodaythaneverbefore.Theycanbeapainintheneck.Theirprecociousdevelopment,adolescentacting-out,drug-taking,allloomasproblems.Theyoungpeoplefeel,‘iftheydon'treallywantus,whyshouldwewanttohavechildren?

’thentheyrationalizethisfeelingintermsoftheexternalquestionslikewhattheworldhastooffer.Theyaskquestionslike,‘whyaddtothepopulationexplosion?

Whycreatepeoplewhowillhavetofacealltheproblemsthatareapproachinginthenextcentury?

’”

14）    “Despitetheirstatedmotivesfornothavingchildren,thequestionariseswhetheryoungpeoplereallyinfactleadricherlivestoday.Ifindthatmanycollegestudentstodayfeelstrangelyempty.Theyliveinaworldfullofstimuliofallsortsbutlackasenseofinnersatisfactionthatmanyrelatetothesebasicbiologicthings.”

 15）    Whateverelsetheydisagreeon,theexpertsallseemtobesayingthatit'snotwhetheryouhavechildrenordon'tthatreallymatters,whatmattersisthatyouarecomfortableaboutwhatyoudo.Ifyoudon'thavechildrenandyouhavemuchinnerconflictaboutit,you'llbemiserableinyourchildlessness;ifyouhavechildrenandregretit,you'llbemiserableandyourchildrenwillbemiserabletoo.Thepointseemstobetoknowyourself,toacceptyourdeeperfeelingsandnotmakesuchanimportantlifedecisionbecauseit'sthethingtodoortosatisfyunrealisticfantasies,ortogiveyourparentswhattheywantortoescapefromotherresponsibilities.

16）    Somepeopleareafraidtoadmittheirownfeelingsofthekindmanyofthechildlesscouplesinterviewedcouldacceptaboutthemselves---whattheycalledbeing"selfish".Theyareashamedtoadmittheywouldrathertravelthanbringupchildren.Butwhatifthatiswhatchangedandifyoudonotrecognizewhatyoursreallyare,youwillnotmakethechoicesthatarerightforyou.

17）    Formany,ofnotmostpeople,thejoysofparenthoodaswellasitsproblemsarewhatlifeisallabout.Toseeone'schildrengrowanddevelopintoindividuals,andtoseeoneselfcontinueoninthem,canbetherichestexperiencebetweenone'sownbirthanddeath.Buttherearealsopeopleforwhomlivinginatimeinwhichattitudesseemtobefreeingupinawaywhichenablesincreasingnumbersofmenandwomentoquestiontheway“everybody”livesifthatisnotthewayisrightforthem.Themorepeoplecontinuetoaskthemselvessuchquestionsaswhetherornottheyreallywanttoraiseafamilybeforetheybegintodoso,thefewerunhappyparentsandtroubledchildrentherewillbe.

 A.       TranslatethefollowingEnglishintoChinese.

ASomeobserverssuggestthatperhapswhatweareseeingisnotarealchangeatall,that,likethesexualrevolution,itisnotreallyarevolutioninbehaviorbutinexpression.||"Itmaybe",