老友记第一季第一集剧本Word下载.docx

老友记第一季第一集剧本Word下载.docx

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[TimeLapse]

Alright,soI'

mbackinhighschool,I'

mstandinginthemiddleofthecafeteria,andIrealizeIamtotallynaked.

All:

Oh,yeah.Hadthatdream.

ThenIlookdown,andIrealizethere'

saphone...there.

Insteadof...?

That'

sright.

Neverhadthatdream.

No.

Allofasudden,thephonestartstoring.NowIdon'

tknowwhattodo,everybodystartslookingatme.

Andtheyweren'

tlookingatyoubefore?

!

Finally,IfigureI'

dbetteranswerit,anditturnsoutit'

smymother,whichisvery-veryweird,because-shenevercallsme!

[TimeLapse,Rosshasentered.]

Ross:

（mortified）Hi.

Thisguysayshello,Iwannakillmyself.

Areyouokay,sweetie?

Ijustfeellikesomeonereacheddownmythroat,grabbedmysmallintestine,pulleditoutofmymouthandtieditaroundmyneck...（我感觉一个人把手伸进我的喉咙，抓住我的小肠，将他从我嘴里拉出来缠在我的脖子上）

Cookie?

（explainingtotheothers）Carolmovedherstuffouttoday.

Ohh.

（toRoss）Letmegetyousomecoffee.

Thanks.

Ooh!

Oh!

（ShestartstopluckattheairjustinfrontofRoss.）

No,nodon'

t!

Stopcleansingmyaura!

（不要驱赶我的灵气）No,justleavemyauraalone,okay?

Fine!

Bemurky!

（保持晦气吧！

I'

llbefine,alright?

Really,everyone.Ihopeshe'

llbeveryhappy.

Noyoudon'

t.

NoIdon'

t,tohellwithher,sheleftme!

Andyouneverknewshewasalesbian...

No!

Okay?

Whydoeseveryonekeepfixatingonthat?

Shedidn'

tknow,howshouldIknow?

SometimesIwishIwasalesbian...（Theyallstareathim.）DidIsaythatoutloud?

Itoldmomanddadlastnight,theyseemedtotakeitprettywell.

Ohreally,sothathystericalphonecallIgotfromawomanatsobbing3:

00A.M.,"

I'

llneverhavegrandchildren,I'

llneverhavegrandchildren."

waswhat?

Awrongnumber?

Sorry.

AlrightRoss,look.You'

refeelingalotofpainrightnow.You'

reangry.You'

rehurting.CanItellyouwhattheansweris?

（Rossgestureshisconsent.）

Stripjoint!

（脱衣舞会）C'

resingle!

Havesomehormones!

Idon'

twanttobesingle,okay?

Ijust...Ijust-Ijustwannabemarriedagain!

（Rachelentersinawetweddingdressandstartstosearchtheroom.）

AndIjustwantamilliondollars!

（Heextendshishandhopefully.）

Rachel?

Rachel:

OhGodMonicahi!

ThankGod!

Ijustwenttoyourbuildingandyouweren'

tthereandthenthisguywithabighammersaidyoumightbehereandyouare,youare!

Waitress:

CanIgetyousomecoffee?

（pointingatRachel）De-caff.（toAll）Okay,everybody,thisisRachel,anotherLincolnHighsurvivor.（toRachel）Thisiseverybody,thisisChandler,andPhoebe,andJoey,and-youremembermybrotherRoss?

Hi,sure!

Hi.

（TheygotohugbutRoss'

sumbrellaopens.Hesitsbackdowndefeatedagain.AmomentofsilencefollowsasRachelsitsandtheothersexpecthertoexplain.）

Soyouwannatellusnow,orarewewaitingforfourwetbridesmaids?

OhGod...well,itstartedaboutahalfhourbeforethewedding.Iwasintheroomwherewewerekeepingallthepresents,andIwaslookingatthisgravyboat（酱油壶）.ThisreallygorgeousLamaugegravyboat.Whenallofasudden-（tothewaitressthatbroughthercoffee）Sweet'

n'

Lo?

-IrealizedthatIwasmoreturnedonbythisgravyboatthanbyBarry!

AndthenIgotreallyfreakedout,andthat'

swhenithitme:

howmuchBarrylookslikeMr.PotatoHead.Y'

know,Imean,Ialwaysknewlookedfamiliar,but...Anyway,Ijusthadtogetoutofthere,andIstartedwondering'

WhyamIdoingthis,andwhoamIdoingthisfor?

'

.（toMonica）SoanywayIjustdidn'

tknowwheretogo,andIknowthatyouandIhavekindadriftedapart,butyou'

retheonlypersonIknewwholivedhereinthecity.

Whowasn'

tinvitedtothewedding.

Ooh,Iwaskindahopingthatwouldn'

tbeanissue...（我希望那件事没有发生过）

Monica'

sApartment,everyoneisthereandwatchingaSpanishSoaponTVandaretryingtofigureoutwhatisgoingon.]

NowI'

mguessingthatheboughtherthebigpipeorgan,andshe'

sreallynothappyaboutit.

（imitatingthecharacters）Tunaoreggsalad?

Decide!

（inadeepvoice）I'

llhavewhateverChristineishaving.

（onphone）Daddy,Ijust...Ican'

tmarryhim!

msorry.Ijustdon'

tlovehim.Well,itmatterstome!

（ThesceneonTVhaschangedtoshowtwowomen,oneisholdingherhair.）

IfIletgoofmyhair,myheadwillfalloff.Chandler:

（reTV）Ooh,sheshouldnotbewearingthosepants.Joey:

Isaypushherdownthestairs.Phoebe,Ross,Chandler,andJoey:

Pushherdownthestairs!

（Sheispusheddownthestairsandeveryonecheers.）

monDaddy,listentome!

It'

slike,it'

slike,allofmylife,everyonehasalwaystoldme,'

You'

reashoe!

You'

reashoe,you'

.AndtodayIjuststoppedandIsaid,'

WhatifIdon'

twannabeashoe?

WhatifIwannabea-apurse,y'

know?

Ora-orahat!

No,I'

mnotsayingIwantyoutobuymeahat,I'

msayingIamaha-It'

sametaphor,Daddy!

Youcanseewherehe'

dhavetrouble.

LookDaddy,it'

smylife.WellmaybeI'

lljuststayherewithMonica.

Well,Iguesswe'

veestablishedwho'

sstayingherewithMonica...

Well,maybethat'

smydecision.Well,maybeIdon'

tneedyourmoney.Wait!

Wait,Isaidmaybe!

[TimeLapse,Rachelisbreatingintoapaperbag.]

Justbreathe,breathe..that'

sit.Justtrytothinkofnicecalmthings...Phoebe:

（sings）Raindropsonrosesandrabbitsandkittens,（RachelandMonicaturntolookather.）bluebellsandsleighbellsand-somethingwithmittens...Lalalala...somethingandnoodleswithstring.Theseareafew...

mallbetternow.

（grinsandwalkstothekitchenandsaystoChandlerandJoey.）Ihelped!

（我的功劳！

Okay,look,thisisprobablyforthebest,y'

Independence.Takingcontrolofyourlife.Thewhole,'

hat'

thing.

（comfortingher）Andhey,youneedanything,youcanalwayscometoJoey.MeandChandlerliveacrossthehall.Andhe'

sawayalot.

Joey,stophittingonher!

sherweddingday!

What,likethere'

saruleorsomething?

（ThedoorbuzzersoundsandChandlergetsit.）

Pleasedon'

tdothatagain,it'

sahorriblesound.

Paul:

（overtheintercom）It'

s,uh,it'

sPaul.

OhGod,isit6:

30?

Buzzhimin!

Who'

sPaul?

PaultheWineGuy,Paul?

Maybe.Joey:

Wait.Your'

notarealdate'

tonightiswithPaultheWineGuy?

Hefinallyaskedyouout?

Yes!

Ooh,thisisaDearDiarymoment.

Rach,wait,Icancancel...

Please,no,go,that'

dbefine!

（toRoss）Are,areyouokay?

Imean,doyouwantmetostay?

（chokedvoice）That'

dbegood...

（horrified）Really?

（normalvoice）No,goon!

sPaultheWineGuy!

Whatdoesthatmean?

Doeshesellit,drinkit,orjustcomplainalot?

（Chandlerdoesn'

tknow.）

（There'

saknockonthedoorandit'

sPaul.）

Hi,comein!

Paul,thisis..（Theyarealllinedupnexttothedoor.）...everybody,everybody,thisisPaul.

Hey!

Paul!

Hi!

TheWineGuy!

msorry,Ididn'

tcatchyourname.Paul,wasit?

Okay,umm-umm,I'

lljust--I'

llberightback,Ijustgottagoah,goah...

Awandering?

Change!

Okay,sitdown.（ShowsPaulin）Twoseconds.（马上）

Ooh,Ijustpulledoutfoureyelashes.（我刚拔掉我四根睫毛）Thatcan'

tbegood.

（Monicagoestochange.）

Hey,Paul!

Yeah?

Here'

salittletip,shereallylikesitwhenyourubherneckinthesamespotoverandoverandoveragainuntilitstartstogetalittlered.（她喜欢你一直抚摸她脖子的一个地方直到那里开始变的微红）

（yellingfromthebedroom）Shutup,Joey!

SoRachel,what'

reyou,uh...what'

reyouuptotonight?

Well,IwaskindasupposedtobeheadedforArubaonmyhoneymoon,sonothing!

Right,you'

renotevengettingyourhoneymoon,God..No,no,although,Aruba,thistimeofyear...talkaboutyour-（thinks）-biglizards...Anyway,ifyoudon'

tfeellikebeingalonetonight,JoeyandChandlerarecomingovertohelpmeputtogethermynewfurniture.

（deadpan）Yes,andwe'

reveryexcitedaboutit.

Wellactuallythanks,butIthinkI'

mjustgonnahangoutheretonight.It'

sbeenkindaalongday.

Okay,sure.

HeyPheebs,youwannahelp?

Oh,IwishIcould,butIdon'

twantto.

CommercialBreak

TheSubway,Phoebeissingingforchange.]

（singing）Loveissweetassummershowers,loveisawondrousworkofart,butyourloveohyourlove,yourlove...islikeagiantpigeon...crappingonmyheart.La-la-la-la-la-