查莉成长日记S01.02.docx
《查莉成长日记S01.02.docx》由会员分享，可在线阅读，更多相关《查莉成长日记S01.02.docx（7页珍藏版）》请在冰点文库上搜索。
Teddy:
Hi,Charlie,It'sTeddyhere.Sorightnowyou'reninemonthsoldandeverythingisgoinggreat.Well,almosteverything.NowwhatI'mabouttoshowyouiskindofdisturbing.Sobraceyourself.
Mom:
Mmm,thesesandwicheswillbeyummywummy.Dad:
Yes,theywill,yes,theywill.
Teddy:
Momanddadhavebeentalkinglikethateversinceyouarrivedandifit'snotoversoon,I'mgonnagocrazywazy.
Gabe:
PJ!
PJ:
What?
Gabe:
Whatareyoulisteningto?
PJ:
Idownloadedapodcastonthehistoryofballet.Gabe:
Youlikethat?
PJ:
Morethanbabytalk.
Mom:
Wouldyoulikesomefishywishieswithyourcookiewookie?
Dad:
Yes,Iwould,yes,Iwould.
Teddy:
Wait,guys,Charlieisn'tevenhere.
Mom:
No,widdlebabytakeanappywappyupstairs.Teddy:
Sowhyareyouguysstilltalkinglikethat?
Dad:
Idon't"weawy"know.
Mom:
Iguesswe'rejustkindafried.
Dad:
Well,weworkallday,takecareofababyallnight.Workshift,babyshift.I'vebarelygottimetomakedoo-doo.
Teddy:
Well,whenwasthelasttimeyouguyshadanightout?
Youknow,likejustthetwoofyou--likeadate?
Dad:
Teddymadeafunny.Mom:
Afunnywunny.
Teddy:
Seriously!
Youknowwhat?
It’sSaturdaynight.Youtwo,yougoout,havefun,anddosomethingbesideswork,takecareofthebabyandmakedoo-doo.
Mom:
Well,it'snicetodream,butwho'sgonnatakeofCharlieTeddy:
Hello!
You’vegotthreegreatbabysittersrighthere.
PJ:
I'mgladIdidn'thearthat.
Mom:
Idon'tknow,Teddy.It'sareallynicethought,butwe'rereallynotreadytogooutwithoutCharliejustyet
Gabe:
Youguyswanttoseeamagictrick?
Mom:
Sure!
Dad:
Okay.
Gabe:
Preparetobeamazed.Mom:
Icoulduseanightout.
Teddy:
Allright,youguyshavefun.Stayoutaslateasyouwant.Butnottoomuchfun--Wehaveenoughkidsalready.
Dad:
I'mserious.
Mom:
Okay,everyone,begood,havefun,loveyou.PJ/Gabe:
Yeahyeah.
Mom:
Allright.
Dad:
Hey,Teddy,thanksfordoingthis.It'sgonnabeniceforyourmomandItohavesomespecialtimetogether.
Mom:
Bob,moveyourbutt!
Dad:
I'mcoming!
Teddy:
Allright,sowedivideitupevenly,weeachgettospendanhourwithCharlie.Whowantstogofirst?
Gabe:
Ithinkyoushouldgofirst.
PJ:
Andsecondandthird,sincethiswasyouridea.
Teddy:
Hey,I'mnotdoingthisallbymyself.Youguyshavetohelpout.PJ:
Fine.I'llgofourth.
Teddy:
Thereisnofourth.
PJ:
ImeantIshallgoforthtotheparktoshootsomehoop.
Teddy:
Youwanttogototheparksobadly,thenwhydon'tyoujusttakeCharlie?
PJ:
What'sababysupposedtodoatthepark?
Teddy:
Babiesloveparks.Youcanshowhertheduckpond,thebluesky,clouds.PJ:
We'rejustgonnalookatstuff?
That’swhatTVisfor.
PJ:
Yeahhehhah,allright!
Thisisgreat.Whee!
Yes,whoo!
Whatareyoulookingat?
Iwasherefirst.Hey,youcanridethatduck.Icouldn'tridetheduck.I'dlooksillyontheduck.Fine.Heythere,Charlie.Arewehavingfunyet?
Allright.
M:
Man,youseenakid'sbirthdaypartyaroundhereanywhere?
I'mtheentertainment.PJ:
Isawabouncehouseoftheotherendofthepark.
M:
Abouncyhouse,eh?
Great.AnothertriptotheE.R.
PJ:
Whoareyousupposedtobeanyway?
Plasticman,rubberman?
M:
No,thoseareallregisteredtrademarks.I'mCaptainStretchy.Thereusedtobea"CS"here,butitcameoffinthewash.
PJ:
Sowhat'syoursuperpower?
M:
Superelasticity.Hey,look,there'saquarter. Ah,forgetit.Notlikeit'sadollar,right?
PJ:
Hi.
Emma:
Hi.
PJ:
Oh,yeah,Ilikeyourtasteinstrollers.Emma:
Thanks,youtoo.Thatbaby'ssocute.PJ:
Youtoo.Oh,Imeanyourstoo.
Emma:
I'mEmma.
PJ:
I'mPJ.Who'sthislittleguy?
Emma:
Mybrother.We'rejustoutforourstroll.Wedothiseveryday.
PJ:
Ustoo.LikeIalwayssay,babiesloveparks.Wouldyouliketositforabit?
Emma:
Sure.SoIsawyoutalkingtoCaptainStretchyearlier.
PJ:
Oh,yeah,hewaslost.Notmuchofasuperhero,right?
Emma:
Oh,he'stheworst.Wehiredhimformybrother'sbirthdaypartyandhesatonthecake.
PJ:
Thatsoundsawful.
Emma:
Oh,itgetsworse.Thecandleswaslit,sohesatinthepunchPJ:
That'ssoweird.Imeanhelookslikesuchaqualityentertainer.
Emma:
Youknow,PJ,I'mreallyimpressedthatyoutakeyourbabysistertothepark.Mybrotherswouldneverdoanythinglikethat.
PJ:
Ihopenot.Sheismysister.
Gabe:
Nowwatchclosely.InthishandIhaveaquarterandintheother,anordinaryegg.NowIputtheminthishat,spinthemaroundalittleandpresto.
Teddy:
Justoutofcuriosity,whatwassupposedtohappen?
PJ:
Ilovethisbaby.Anytimeshewantstogotothepark,signmeup.Teddy:
Whathappenedtoyou?
PJ:
Let'sjustsayCharliemadeafriend,PJmadeafriend.
Teddy:
Oh--anddideitheryouoryourfriendbothertochangeadipper?
PJ:
There'snotimeforthat.IwastoobusytalkingtoEmma.
Gabe:
Who'sEmma?
PJ:
Avision,anangel,thegirlwho'smovedintomyheart.Gabe:
Didyoutellheraboutthevacancyinyourbrain?
Teddy:
PJ?
PJ:
What?
Teddy:
Youbroughthomethewrongbaby.PJ:
What?
Ididnot.
Teddy:
Takealook!
Wrongparts.
Gabe:
There'snothingwrongwiththoseparts.
Teddy:
Howcouldyoubringhomethewrongbaby?
PJ:
I'msorry.Igotalittledistracted.Emmaisreallycute.
Teddy:
Yeah,well,sowasoursister.Comeon,let'sgototheparkandfindher.PJ:
Relax!
Igothernumber.
Teddy:
Thenwhatareyouwaitingfor?
callher.
PJ:
Waitasecond.Isittoosoon?
IfIcallnow,she'llthinkI'mdesperate.Teddy:
Oh,youaredesperate.
PJ:
Goodpoint.Hello,isEmmathere?
ThisisaChineserestaurant?
Sure,I'llhearthespecials.
Teddy:
Shegaveyouthewrongnumber.Gabe:
Whocouldn'tseethatonecoming?
PJ:
ButIgavehergumandhelpedherchangeapoopydiaper.Itwassoromantic.Teddy:
Well,whatdowedonow?
Ohno!
Himom,whatup?
Yeah,everything'sgoinggreat.Whywouldn'titbe?
We'rejusthavingagrandoldtimeherewith—Baby.Yeah,sureyoucantalktohim.herher!
Talktomommy.Whatdoyoumeanthatdid't
soundlikeCharlie?
What,doyoujustthinkI'mmakingbabynoisesintothephone?
Mom,that'scrazy.Allright,bye.Saybye,Charlie.
PJ:
NotthatI'minthepositiontocriticize,butIwasgettingmoremonkey.Teddy:
Comeon,let'sgotothepark.
Gabe:
AndmeetthegirlwhoblewoffPJ?
I'mthere.
PJ:
Idon'tseeher.
Teddy:
PJ,whatdidshelooklike?
PJ:
Shewashot,butwhatdoesitmatter?
Gabe:
Maybeweshouldcallsomeone.Whodoyoucallwhenyousearchababy.PJ:
CaptainStretchy!
Teddy:
Whatisthat?
PJ:
You'restillhere?
M:
EverySaturdayandSundayalldaylong.Stayinschool,kids.PJ:
Justtheguyweneededtosee.Ithinkyoucanhelpus.
M:
Hey,kid,I'mjustanentertainer.Ican'tgetmommyanddaddybacktogether.
PJ:
No,youdon'tunderstand.Iwastalkingtoagirlhereearlier,andshesaidthatyouworkedapartyforherbrother.
M:
So?
Iworklotsofparties.
PJ:
Wherewasthepartywhereyoufelloncake?
M:
Yougotthreehours?
Teddy:
Thisisreallyimportant.Weneedtofindher.
M:
Interestingsituation.Youkidsneedinfo,andIneedamirdle.–Teddy:
Whatisamirdle?
M:
That'samangirdle.Andtheyain'tcheap.Teddy:
Yeah,neitherisdrycleaning,apparently.
PJ:
Hername'sEmma.Didshecomebacktothepark?
M:
Well,maybeshedidandmaybeshedidn't.
PJ:
Stoprubbingyourfingerstogetherandanswermyquestion.Gabe:
Hewantsabribe.
PJ:
Ican'tbelieveit.Here.
M:
HereiswhatIkonw:
HernameisEmma.PJ:
Ijusttoldyouthat.
M:
Ididn'tsaytheinformationwasfresh.Yeah,Iknowthegirl.Shecomesfromabigfamily--seven,eightkids.ForthemI'vebeen...AstronautPete,cowboyBob...
Gabe:
MagicMarv?
M:
Yeah!
You'refamiliarwithmywork.
Gabe:
Yeah,anditstinks.I'mjuststartingoffandI'mabettermagicianthanyouare.M:
Ohyeah?
Youthinkthisiseasy,huh?
Here.Turnthatintoaschnauzer.Youcan'tdoit,huh?
Maybeit'sbecauseyoudon'thavethechops!
Teddy:
Well,Stretchy,doyouknowwhereshelives?
M:
Yeah,aroundheresomewhere.I'dknowitifIsawit.-Great!
Teddy:
Nowyouhelpustonightandwe'llgetyouintothatmirdletomorrow.Oh,andyouunderstandwe'renotactuallygonnaputyouintoit?
Thatyouhavetodobyyourself.
M:
Yeah,Igetit.
Teddy:
Allright,comeon,guys,wehavetogofindher.M:
Uh,hey--CaptainStretchy,away!
PJ:
Truck'sthisway.–M:
Oh,okay.
Dad:
Orderwhateveryouwant,honey.Igetadiscounthere.Thisplaceisoneofmybestcustomers.
Mom:
Notwhatyouwanttohearfromanexterminator.Oh,lookatthat.Dad:
Oh,fajitas.
Mom:
Notthat,thebaby.Alittlebabyinastrollerjustlikeours.
Dad:
Yeah,okay,honey,thisissupposedtobeanightawayfromthebaby.Solet'scomeback.
Mom:
Okayokay,I'mback.I'mback.Justgottaruntotheladies'room.Dad:
Ohoh,hey,listen,whileyou'reinthere,couldyoucheckthetraps?
Mom:
Hola.Adios.Bob,willyougooverandlookatthatbaby?
Ithinkit'sCharlie.Dad:
What?
!
Mom:
Youheardme,thatisCharlie!
Dad:
Sweetheart,wouldyousitdown,please?
Mom:
Iwillnotsitdown.Amotherknowsherownbabyandthatismybaby.
Dad:
Honey,seriously,whatdoyouthinkhappenedhere?
Inthelasthoursomebodywentovertoourhouse,borrowedourbabythenbroughtheroutforchipsandguac?
Mom:
Idon'tknow,it'sabigfamily.Maybethat'showtheygettheirbabies.
Dad:
Sweetheart,Ithinkyou'rejustmissingCharlie,andyou'rehavingalittleseparationanxiety.
Mom:
Oh,okay.You'reright.Crazywazy.Imean,thatisn'tpossible,right?
Dad:
Exactly.
Mom:
I'mjustgoingtogototheladies'roomonemoretime.
Dad:
Sitdown.Nowlet'senjoytherestofournightoutatthisverylovelyrestaurant.Okay?
Mom:
Okay.
Dad:
I'mneededinthekitch
升级会员 