Friends老友记六人行中英文对照剧本第二季第十九集.doc

Friends老友记六人行中英文对照剧本第二季第十九集.doc

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Friends老友记六人行中英文对照剧本第二季

219TheOneWhereEddieWon'tGo

[Scene:

Chandler'sbedroom.ChandlerissleepingandEddieistherewatchinghim.]

[Chandlerwakesup]

CHANDLER:

HeyEddie.Daahh!

!

What'reyoudoin'here?

EDDIE:

Nothin'roomie,justwatchin'yousleep.

CHANDLER:

Why?

EDDIE:

Makesmefeelum,peaceful,heh-heh,please.

CHANDLER:

Ican'tsleepnow.

EDDIE:

Youwantmetosing?

CHANDLER:

No,look,that'sit,it'sover,Iwantyouout,Iwantyououtoftheapartmentnow.

EDDIE:

Woah,woah,woah,what're,what'reyoutalkin'aboutman.

CHANDLER:

HannibalLecter...betterroommatethanyou.

EDDIE:

No.SeenowIdon'tthinkyou'rebeingfair.Imeanonenightyouseemeandyougetscared,Imean,whataboutalltheothernightswhenyoudon'tseeme,huh?

WhataboutlastnightwhenyouwentandgotadrinkofwaterandIwasniceenoughtohidebehindthedoor,what'sthatabout,huh?

CHANDLER:

Ididn'trealizethat.

EDDIE:

Yeah.

CHANDLER:

GETOUTNOW!

!

EDDIE:

Ok,youreallywantmeout?

CHANDLER:

Yesplease.

EDDIE:

Ok,thenIwanttohearyousayit,I,Iwanttohearyousayyouwantmeout.

CHANDLER:

Iwantyouout.

EDDIE:

Nonono,Iwannahearitfromyourlips.

CHANDLER:

Wheredidyouhearitfrombefore?

EDDIE:

Oh,right,allright,youknowwhatpallieIunderstand,considermegone,youknowwhat,I'llbeoutbythetimeyougethomefromworktomorrow.

[EddieleavestheroomandChandlermouths"Thankyou"tohimself]

EDDIE:

Iheardthat.

OPENINGTITLES

[Scene:

CentralPerk.MonicaandRachelarethere,Joeyenterswearinganoldlookinghat.]

JOEY:

Hey.

MONICA:

Hey.

RACHEL:

Hey.Whe-ell,lookatyou,finallygotthattimemachineworkin'huh?

JOEY:

Seriously,youlikeit?

Thisguywassellin'themon8thavenueandIlookedat'emandIthough,youknowwhatIdon'thave?

MONICA:

Amirror?

JOEY:

Fine,makefun.Ithinkit'sjaunty.

MONICA:

Wow,foraguywho'srecentlylosthisjob,you'reinanawfullygoodmood.

JOEY:

Hey,I'llbealright.Imeanit'snotlikeI'mstartingfromsqareone.IwasDr.DrakeRemorayonDaysofOurLives.Heh?

Imeanthat'sgottahavesomekindofcache.

MONICA:

Cache?

Jaunty?

JOEY:

Chandlergavemewordofthedaytoiletpaper.I'mgonnagetsomecoffee.

[Phoebeenters]

PHOEBE:

Hey.

MONICA:

Hey.

RACHEL:

Hey.

PHOEBE:

Oooh,sososo,didyoureadthebook?

MONICA:

OhmyGod,itwasincredible.

PHOEBE:

Didn'titliketotallyspeaktoyou?

RACHEL:

Woah,woah,woah,whatbookisthis?

MONICA:

Rachelyouhavetoreadthisbook.It'scalledBeYourOwnWindkeeper.It'sabouthowwomenneedtobecomemoreempowered.

PHOEBE:

Yeahandoh,andbutthere's,there'swindandthewindcanmakeusGoddesses.Butyouknowwhotakesoutwind?

Men,theyjusttakeit.

RACHEL:

Menjusttakeoutwind?

PHOEBE:

Ya-huh,allthetime,causetheyarethelightningbearers.

RACHEL:

Wow.

PHOEBE:

Yeah.

RACHEL:

Wellthatsoundskindacool,kindalikeTheHobbit.

MONICA:

ItisnothingliketheHobbit.It'slikereadingabouteveryrelationshipI'veeverhad,exceptforRichard.

PHOEBE:

Ohyes,no,Richardwouldneverstealyourwind.

MONICA:

No.

PHOEBE:

No,'causehe'syummy.

MONICA:

Yes.Butalltheotherones.

PHOEBE:

Ohyes.Ohand,thepartabouthowthey'realwayslikedrinkingfromoutpoolofinnerpower,butGodforbidweshouldtakeasip.

JOEY:

Anybodywantacroan.

PHOEBE:

Ok,thisisatypicallightning-bearerthing.Rightthere,it'slike,um,'Hello,whowantsoneofmyfallicshapedmancakes?

'

[Scene:

EstelleLeonardTalentAgency.Joeyisthere.]

ESTELLE:

Don'tworryaboutitalready.Thingshappen.

JOEY:

So,you'renotmadatmeforgettingfiredandeverything?

ESTELLE:

Joey,lookatme,lookatme.DoIhavelipstickonmyteeth?

JOEY:

No,canwegetbacktome?

ESTELLE:

Lookhoney,peoplegetfiredleftandrightinthisbusiness.IalreadygotyouanauditionforAnotherWorld.

JOEY:

Alright.Cabdrivernumbertwo?

ESTELLE:

You'rewelcome.

JOEY:

ButIwasDr.DrakeRemoray.HowcanIgofrombein'aneurosurgeontodrivin'acab?

ESTELLE:

Thingschange,rollwithem.

JOEY:

Butthisisatwolinepart,it'sliketakin'astepbackwards.I'mnotgonnadothis.

ESTELLE:

Joey,I'mgonnatellyouthesamethingItoldAlMinserandhispyramidofdogs.Takeanyjobyoucangetanddon'tmakeonthefloor.

JOEY:

I'msorry.Seeya.

[Scene:

CentralPerk.Monica,Phoebe,andRachelarethere.Rachelhasjustfinishedreadingthebook.]

RACHEL:

Oh,God,oh,God,Imeanit'sjustso.

MONICA:

Isn'tit.

RACHEL:

Uhh,Imeanthisislikereadingaboutmyownlife.Imeanthisbookcouldhavebeencalled'BeYourOwnWindkeeperRachel'.

PHOEBE:

Idon'tthinkitwouldhavesoldamillioncopiesbutitwouldhavemadeanicegiftforyou.

ROSS:

Heyyouguys.

MONICA:

Hey.

ROSS:

Uh,sweetiewe'vegottago.

RACHEL:

NO!

ROSS:

No?

RACHEL:

No,whydowealwayshavetodoeverythingaccordingtoyourtimetable?

ROSS:

Actuallyit'sthemovietheatrethathasthetimeschedule.Soyoudon'tmissthebeginning.

RACHEL:

No,seethisisn'taboutthemovietheatre,thisisaboutyoustealingmywind.

MONICA:

Yougogirl.Ican'tpullthatoffcanI?

ROSS:

Excuseme,your,your,yourwind?

RACHEL:

Yes,mywind.Howdoyouexpectmetogrowifyouwon'tletmeblow?

ROSS:

You,youknowI,Idon't,havea-haveaproblemwiththat.

RACHEL:

Ok,Ijust,Ijustreallyneedtobewithmyselfrightnow.I'msorry.

PHOEBE:

Um-um,um-um.

RACHEL:

You'reright,Idon'thavetoapologize.Sorry.Damnit!

[Scene:

Joey'sapartment.JoeyandRossenter.]

JOEY:

Whatisit?

ROSS:

I,Idon'tknow,it'sgotallthisstuffaboutwindandtreesandthere'ssomekindofsacredpoolinit.Imean,Idon'treallygetitbutshe's,she'sprettyupsetaboutit.

JOEY:

See,thisiswhyIdon'tdatewomenwhoread.Uh-oh.

ROSS:

What,what'sthat?

JOEY:

It'smyVISAbill.Envelopeoneoftwo.Thatcan'tbegood.

ROSS:

Openit,openin.

JOEY:

OhmyGod.

ROSS:

Woah.

JOEY:

Lookatthis,howdidIspendsomuchmoney?

ROSS:

UhJoey,that'sjusttheminumumamountdue,that'syourtotaldue.

JOEY:

Ahh.

ROSS:

What,woah,woah,$3500atporcelainsafari?

JOEY:

Myanimals.Heytheguysaidtheysuitedme,hespokewithanaccent,Iwasallconfused.Idon'tknowwhatI'mgonnado.

ROSS:

WellIguessyoucanstartbydrivinacabonAnotherWorld.

JOEY:

What?

ROSS:

Thataudition.

JOEY:

That'satwolinepart.

ROSS:

Joey,youowe$1100atILoveLucite.

JOEY:

Sowhat.

ROSS:

Sosuckitupman,it'sajob,it'smoney.

JOEY:

Hey,look,Idon'tneedyougettingalljudgementalandcondescendingandpedantic.

ROSS:

Toiletpaper?

JOEY:

Yeah.

ROSS:

Look,I'mnotbeinganyofthosethings,ok,I'mjustbeingrealistic.

JOEY:

Wellknockitoff,you'resupposedtobemyfriend.

ROSS:

Iamyourfriend.

JOEY:

Wellthentellmethingslike,'Joeyyou'llbefine,'and,'Hanginthere,'and,and,'Somethin'big'sfonnacomealong,Iknowit.'

ROSS:

ButIdon'tknowit.WhatIdoknowisthatyouowe$2300atIsn'titChromantic.

JOEY:

HeyRoss,I'mawareofwhatIowe.

ROSS:

Ok,wellthengetsomesense.Imeanittookyouwhat,10yearstogetthatjob,whoknowshowlongit'sgonnabetillyougetanother.

JOEY:

Look,Idon'twannahearthisrightnow.

ROSS:

Huh,I'mjustsaying...

JOEY:

Welldon'tjustsay.

ROSS:

Yaknow,maybe,maybeIshouldjustgo.

JOEY:

Ok.

ROSS:

Ok.I'llseeyalater.Justthinkaboutit,ok.

JOEY:

Idon'tneedtothinkaboutit.IwasDr.DrakeRemoray.Thatwashuge.Bigthingsaregonnahappen,you'llsee.Ross,youstillthere?

[Scene:

Chandler'sapartment.Chandlerpeeksinthedoor.Hedoesn'tseeEddiesoheenters,breathingasighofrelief.Eddiepopsupfrombehindthebar.]

EDDIE:

Heypal.

CHANDLER:

Ahhhh-gaaaahhh.Eddiewhat'reyoustilldoin'here?

EDDIE:

Ah,justsomebasicdehydratingofafewfruitsandvegetables.MANALIVEthisthing'sfantastic!

CHANDLER:

LookEddie,aren'tyouforgettinganything?

EDDIE:

Ohyeah,that'sright,lookIgotusanewgoldfish.He'salotfiestierthatthelastone.

CHANDLER:

Maybe'causethelastonewasmadebyPepperidgeFarm.LookEddie,isn'ttheresomethingelseyou'resupposedtobedoingrightnow?

EDDIE:

Well,notunlessit'sgotsomethingtodowithdehydratingmymanbecauserightnowI'madehydratingmaniac!

CHANDLER:

Lookyouhavetohelpmeouthere.Ithoughtwehadadeal.Ithoughtbythetime...

EDDIE:

Ah-ah-ah,youknowwhatthatis?

CHANDLER:

Yourlastroommate'skidney?

EDDIE:

That'satomato.Thisonedefinitelygoesinthedisplay.

[Scene:

CentralPerk.Joeygoesuptothebartoorder.]

JOEY:

HeyGunther,letmegetalemonadetogo.

GUNTHER:

Lemonade?

Youokman?

JOEY:

Ah,it'scareerstuff.Idon'tknowifyouheardbuttheykilledoffmycharacterontheshow.

GUNTHER:

Oh,that'stoobad.How'dtheydoit?

JOEY:

Ifelldownanelevatorshaft.

GUNTHER:

Thatsucks.Iwasburiedinanavalanche.

JOEY:

What?

GUNTHER:

IusedtobeBryceonAllMyChildren.

[Scene:

MonicaandRachel'sapartment.Chandlerissleepingonthecouch.Monicawalksbyandstartswatchinghim.]

[Chandlerwakesup]

CHANDLER:

Daaahhhh!

MONICA:

Aaahhhhhhh!

Aaahhhh!

CHANDLER:

Whymusteverybodywatchmesleep?

There'llbenomorewatchingmesleep,nomorewatching.

MONICA:

Iwa-

CHANDLER:

Uuuh.

[Scene:

Chandler'sapartment.ChandlerisreturningfromMonicaandRachel'swithhisbedding.Eddieisstandingatthebarwithhisdehydratorandloadsoffruit.]

EDDIE:

Heyman,checkitout,Igotsomegreatstufftodehydratehere.Igotsomegrapes,gotsomeapricots,Ithoughtitwouldbereallycooltoseewhathappenswiththesewaterballoons.

CHANDLER:

Getout.Getout,getout,getout,getout,getout,getout.

EDDIE:

What?

CHANDLER:

You,moveout.Takeyourfruit,yourstupidsmallfruitandGETOUT!

EDDIE:

You,youwan