新编大学英语3课文原文.docx

新编大学英语3课文原文.docx

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新编大学英语3课文原文

Book3

Unit1Personality

TheMiseryofShyness

Shynessisthecauseofmuchunhappinessforagreatmanypeople.Allkindsofpeopledescribethemselvesasshy:

short,tall,dull,intelligent,young,old,slim,overweight.Shypeopleareanxiousandself-conscious;thatis,theyareexcessivelyconcernedwiththeirownappearanceandactions.Worrisomethoughtsareconstantlyswirlingintheirminds:

WhatkindofimpressionamImaking?

Dotheylikeme?

DoIsoundstupid?

I'mugly.I'mwearingunattractiveclothes.

Itisobviousthatsuchuncomfortablefeelingsmustaffectpeopleadversely.Aperson'sself-conceptisreflectedinthewayheorshebehaves,andthewayapersonbehavesaffectsotherpeople'sreactions.Ingeneral,thewaypeoplethinkaboutthemselveshasaprofoundeffectonallareasoftheirlives.Forinstance,peoplewhohaveapositivesenseofself-worthorhighself-esteemusuallyactwithconfidence.Becausetheyhaveself-assurance,theydonotneedconstantpraiseandencouragementfromotherstofeelgoodaboutthemselves.Self-confidentpeopleparticipateinlifeenthusiasticallyandspontaneously.Theyarenotaffectedbywhatothersthinkthey"should"do.Peoplewithhighself-esteemarenothurtbycriticism;theydonotregardcriticismasapersonalattack.Instead,theyviewacriticismasasuggestionforimprovement.

Incontrast,shypeople,havinglowself-esteem,arelikelytobepassiveandeasilyinfluencedbyothers.Theyneedreassurancethattheyaredoing"therightthing".Shypeopleareverysensitivetocriticism;theyfeelitconfirmstheirinferiority.Theyalsofinditdifficulttobepleasedbycomplimentsbecausetheybelievetheyareunworthyofpraise.Ashypersonmayrespondtoacomplimentwithastatementlikethisone:

"You'rejustsayingthattomakemefeelgood.Iknowit'snottrue."Itisclearthat,whileself-awarenessisahealthyquality,overdoingitisdetrimental,orharmful.

Canshynessbecompletelyeliminated,oratleastreduced?

Fortunately,peoplecanovercomeshynesswithdeterminedandpatienteffortinbuildingself-confidence.Sinceshynessgoeshandinhandwithlackofself-esteem,itisimportantforpeopletoaccepttheirweaknessesaswellastheirstrengths.Forexample,mostpeoplewouldliketobe"A"studentsineverysubject.Itisnotfairforthemtolabelthemselvesasinferiorbecausetheyhavedifficultyinsomeareas.People'sexpectationsofthemselvesmustberealistic.Dwellingontheimpossibleleadstoasenseofinadequacy,andevenfeelingsofenvy,orjealousy.Weareself-destructivewhenweenvyastudentwhogetsbettergrades.

Ifyouareshy,herearesomespecifichelpfulstepstowardbuildingself-confidenceandovercomingshyness:

1.Recognizeyourpersonalstrengthsandweaknesses.Everyonehasboth.Asself-acceptancegrows,shynessnaturallydiminishes.

2.Setreasonablegoals.Forexample,youmaybetimidaboutbeingwithagroupofstrangersataparty.Don'tfeelthatyoumustconversewitheveryone.Concentrateontalkingtoonlyoneortwopeople.Youwillfeelmorecomfortable.

3.Guiltandshamearedestructivefeelings.Don'twastetimeandenergyonthem.Supposeyouhavehurtsomeone'sfeelings.Feelingashamedaccomplishesnothing.Instead,acceptthefactthatyouhavemadeamistake,andmakeupyourmindtobemoresensitiveinthefuture.

4.Therearenumerousapproachestoallissues.Fewopinionsarecompletelyrightorwrong.Don'tbeafraidtospeakupandgiveyourpointofview.

5.Donotmakenegativecommentsaboutyourself.Thisisaformofself-rejection.Avoiddescribingyourselfasstupid,ugly,afailure.Accentthepositive.

6.Acceptcriticismthoughtfully.Donotinterpretitasapersonalattack.If,forexample,afriendcomplainsaboutyourcooking,acceptitasacommentonyourcooking,notyourself.Beassuredthatyouarestillgoodfriends,butperhapsyourcookingcouldimprove.

7.Rememberthateveryoneexperiencessomefailuresanddisappointments.Profitfromthemaslearningexperiences.Veryoftenadisappointmentbecomesaturningpointforawonderfulexperiencetocomealong.Forinstance,youmayberejectedbythecollegeofyourchoice.However,atthecollegeyouactuallyattend,youmayfindaqualityofeducationbeyondwhatyouhadexpected.

8.Donotassociatewithpeoplewhomakeyoufeelinadequate.Trytochangetheirattitudeoryours,orremoveyourselffromthatrelationship.Peoplewhohurtyoudonothaveyourbestinterestsatheart.

9.Setasidetimetorelax,enjoyhobbies,andre-evaluateyourgoalsregularly.Timespentthiswayhelpsyoulearnmoreaboutyourself.

10.Practicebeinginsocialsituations.Don'tisolateyourselffrompeople.Trymakingoneacquaintanceatatime;eventuallyyouwillcirculateinlargegroupswithskillandself-assurance.

Eachoneofusisaunique,valuableindividual.Weareinterestinginourownpersonalways.Thebetterweunderstandourselves,theeasieritbecomestoliveuptoourfullpotential.Let'snotallowshynesstoblockourchancesforarichandfulfillinglife.

TwoWaysofLookingatLife

Yourattitudestronglyreflectsyouroutlookonlife.Takeacloserlookatthatconnection.Areyouapessimist—oranoptimist?

Canyouseehowyourwayoflookingactuallydoescoloryourattitude?

Andremember:

changeyouroutlookandyouchangeyourattitude.

Thefatherislookingdownintothecribathissleepingnewborndaughter,justhomefromthehospital.Hisheartisoverflowingwithaweandgratitudeforthebeautyofher,theperfection.

Thebabyopenshereyesandstaresstraightup.

Thefathercallshername,expectingthatshewillturnherheadandlookathim.Hereyesdon'tmove.4Hepicksupafurrylittletoyattachedtotherailofthecribandshakesit,ringingthebellitcontains.Thebaby'seyesdon'tmove.

Hishearthasbeguntobeatrapidly.Hefindshiswifeintheirbedroomandtellsherwhatjusthappened."Shedoesn'tseemtorespondtonoiseatall,"hesays."It'sasifshecan'thear."

"I'msureshe'sallright,"thewifesays,pullingherdressinggownaroundher.Togethertheygointothebaby'sroom.

Shecallsthebaby'sname,jinglesthebell,clapsherhands.Thenshepicksupthebaby,whoimmediatelybecomeslivelyandmakeshappysounds.

"MyGod,"thefathersays."She'sdeaf."

"No,she'snot,"themothersays."Imean,it'stoosoontosayathinglikethat.Look,she'sbrand-new.Hereyesdon'tevenfocusyet."

"Buttherewasn'ttheslightestmovement,evenwhenyouclappedashardasyoucould."

Themothertakesabookfromtheshelf."Let'sreadwhat'sinthebabybook,"shesays.Shelooksup"hearing"andreadsoutloud:

"'Don'tbealarmedifyournewbornfailstobestartledbyloudnoisesorfailstoturntowardsound.Reactionstosoundoftentakesometimetodevelop.Yourpediatriciancantestyourchild'shearingneurologically.

"There,"themothersays."Doesn'tthatmakeyoufeelbetter?

"

"Notmuch,"thefathersays."Itdoesn'tevenmentiontheotherpossibility,thatthebabyisdeaf.AndallIknowisthatmybabydoesn'thearathing.I'vegottheworstfeelingaboutthis.Maybeit'sbecausemygrandfatherwasdeaf.Ifthatbeautifulbabyisdeafandit'smyfault,I'llneverforgivemyself."

"Hey,waitaminute,"saysthewife."You'reworryingtoomuch.We'llcallthepediatricianfirstthingMonday.Inthemeantime,cheerup.Here,holdthebabywhileIfixherblanket.It'sallpulledout."

Thefathertakesthebabybutgivesherbacktohiswifeassoonashecan.Allweekendhefindshimselfunabletopreparefornextweek'swork.Hefollowshiswifearoundthehouse,thinkingaboutthebaby'shearingandaboutthewaydeafnesswouldruinherlife.Heimaginesonlytheworst:

nohearing,nodevelopmentoflanguage,hisbeautifulchildcutofffromsociety,lockedinasoundlessworld.BySundaynighthehassunkintodespair.

Themotherleavesamessagewiththepediatrician'sansweringserviceaskingforanearlyappointmentMonday.Shespendstheweekenddoingherexercises,reading,andtryingtocalmherhusband.

Thepediatrician'stestsarereassuring,butthefather'sspiritsremainlow.Notuntilaweeklater,whenthebabyshowsherfirststartletotheloudsoundofapassingtruck,doeshebegintorecoverandenjoyhisnewdaughteragain.

Thisfatherandmotherhavetwodifferentwaysoflookingattheworld.Wheneversomethingbadhappenstohim—acallfromthebankmanager,adisagreementwithhiswife,evenafrownfromhisemployer—heimaginestheworst:

bankruptcy,jail,divorce,anddismissal.Heispronetodepression;heoftenfeelsextremelytired;hishealthsuffers.She,ontheotherhand,seesbadeventsintheirleastthreateninglight.Toher,theyaretemporarychallengestobeovercome.Afterareversal,shebouncesbackquickly,andfindsallherenergyagain.Herhealthisexcellent.

Theoptimistsandthepessimists:

Ihavebeenstudyingthemforthepasttwenty-fiveyears.Thedefiningcharacteristicofpessimistsisthattheytendtobelievebadeventswilllastalongtime,willundermineeverythingtheydo,andaretheirownfault.Theoptimists,whoareconfrontedwiththesamehardknocksofthisworld,thinkaboutmisfortuneintheoppositeway.Theytendtobelievedefeatisjustatemporarysetback,thatitscausesareconfinedtothisonecase.Theoptimistsbelievedefeatisnottheirfault:

circumstances,badluck,orotherpeoplebroughtitabout.Suchpeoplearenotbotheredbydefeat.Confrontedbyabadsituation,theyperceiveitasachallengeandtryharder.

Thesetwohabitsofthinkingaboutcauseshaveconsequences.Literallyhundredsofstudiesshowthatpessimistsgiveupmoreeasi