Part 1 Chapter 43Word格式.docx

Part 1 Chapter 43Word格式.docx

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Dying,Itellyou;

whatmoredoyouwant?

someoneelsewasscreamingathisotherside.MaslovacouldnothearwhatNekhludoffwassaying,buttheexpressionofhisfaceashewasspeakingremindedherofhim.Shedidnotbelieveherowneyes;

stillthesmilevanishedfromherfaceandadeeplineofsufferingappearedonherbrow.

Icannothearwhatyouaresaying,"

shecalledout,wrinklingherbrowandfrowningmoreandmore.

Ihavecome,"

saidNekhludoff."

Yes,Iamdoingmyduty--Iamconfessing,"

thoughtNekhludoff;

andatthisthoughtthetearscameinhiseyes,andhefeltachokingsensationinhisthroat,andholdingonwithbothhandstothenet,hemadeeffortstokeepfromburstingintotears.

Isay,whydoyoushoveyourselfinwhereyou'

renotwanted?

someoneshoutedatonesideofhim.

Godismywitness;

Iknownothing,"

screamedaprisonerfromtheotherside.

Noticinghisexcitement,Maslovarecognisedhim.

You'

relike...butno;

Idon'

tknowyou,"

sheshouted,withoutlookingathim,andblushing,whileherfacegrewstillmorestern.

Ihavecometoaskyoutoforgiveme,"

hesaid,inaloudbutmonotonousvoice,likealessonlearntbyheart.Havingsaidthesewordshebecameconfused;

butimmediatelycamethethoughtthat,ifhefeltashamed,itwasallthebetter;

hehadtobearthisshame,andhecontinuedinaloudvoice:

Forgiveme;

Ihavewrongedyouterribly."

Shestoodmotionlessandwithouttakinghersquintingeyesoffhim.

Hecouldnotcontinuetospeak,andsteppingawayfromthenethetriedtosuppressthesobsthatwerechokinghim.

Theinspector,thesameofficerwhohaddirectedNekhludofftothewomen'

sward,andwhoseinterestheseemedtohavearoused,cameintotheroom,and,seeingNekhludoffnotatthenet,askedhimwhyhewasnottalkingtoherwhomhewantedtosee.Nekhludoffblewhisnose,gavehimselfashake,and,tryingtoappearcalm,said:

It'

ssoinconvenientthroughthesenets;

nothingcanbeheard."

Againtheinspectorconsideredforamoment.

Ah,well,shecanbebroughtouthereforawhile.MaryKarlovna,"

turningtothewarder,"

leadMaslovaout."

AminutelaterMaslovacameoutofthesidedoor.Steppingsoftly,shecameupclosetoNekhludoff,stopped,andlookedupathimfromunderherbrows.Herblackhairwasarrangedinringletsoverherforeheadinthesamewayasithadbeentwodaysago;

herface,thoughunhealthyandpuffy,wasattractive,andlookedperfectlycalm,onlytheglitteringblackeyesglancedstrangelyfromundertheswollenlids.

Youmaytalkhere,"

saidtheinspector,andshrugginghisshouldershesteppedasidewithalookofsurprise.Nekhludoffmovedtowardsaseatbythewall.

Maslovacastaquestioninglookattheinspector,andthen,shrugginghershouldersinsurprise,followedNekhludofftothebench,andhavingarrangedherskirt,satdownbesidehim.

Iknowitishardforyoutoforgiveme,"

hebegan,butstopped.Histearswerechokinghim."

ButthoughIcan'

tundothepast,Ishallnowdowhatisinmypower.Tellme--"

Howhaveyoumanagedtofindme?

shesaid,withoutansweringhisquestion,neitherlookingawayfromhimnorquiteathim,withhersquintingeyes.

OGod,helpme!

Teachmewhattodo,"

Nekhludoffthought,lookingatherchangedface."

Iwasonthejurythedaybeforeyesterday,"

hesaid."

Youdidnotrecogniseme?

No,Ididnot;

therewasnottimeforrecognitions.Ididnotevenlook,"

shesaid.

Therewasachild,wastherenot?

heasked.

ThankGod!

hediedatonce,"

sheanswered,abruptlyandviciously.

Whatdoyoumean?

Why?

Iwassoillmyself,Inearlydied,"

shesaid,inthesamequietvoice,whichNekhludoffhadnotexpectedandcouldnotunderstand.

Howcouldmyauntshaveletyougo?

Whokeepsaservantthathasababy?

Theysentmeoffassoonastheynoticed.Butwhyspeakofthis?

Iremembernothing.That'

sallfinished."

No,itisnotfinished;

Iwishtoredeemmysin."

There'

snothingtoredeem.What'

sbeenhasbeenandispassed,"

shesaid;

and,whatheneverexpected,shelookedathimandsmiledinanunpleasantlyluring,yetpiteous,manner.

Maslovaneverexpectedtoseehimagain,andcertainlynothereandnotnow;

therefore,whenshefirstrecognisedhim,shecouldnotkeepbackthememorieswhichsheneverwishedtorevive.Inthefirstmomentsheremembereddimlythatnew,wonderfulworldoffeelingandofthoughtwhichhadbeenopenedtoherbythecharmingyoungmanwholovedherandwhomsheloved,andthenhisincomprehensiblecrueltyandthewholestringofhumiliationsandsufferingwhichflowedfromandfollowedthatmagicjoy.Thisgaveherpain,and,unabletounderstandit,shedidwhatshewasalwaysinthehabitofdoing,shegotridofthesememoriesbyenvelopingtheminthemistofadepravedlife.Inthefirstmoment,sheassociatedthemannowsittingbesideherwiththeladshehadloved;

butfeelingthatthisgaveherpain,shedissociatedthemagain.Now,thiswell-dressed,carefully-got-upgentlemanwithperfumedbeardwasnolongertheNekhludoffwhomshehadlovedbutonlyoneofthepeoplewhomadeuseofcreatureslikeherselfwhentheyneededthem,andwhomcreatureslikeherselfhadtomakeuseofintheirturnasprofitablyastheycould;

andthatiswhyshelookedathimwithaluringsmileandconsideredsilentlyhowshecouldbestmakeuseofhim.

That'

sallatanend,"

shesaid."

NowI'

mcondemnedtoSiberia,"

andherliptrembledasshewassayingthisdreadfulword.

Iknew;

Iwascertainyouwerenotguilty,"

saidNekhludoff.

Guilty!

ofcoursenot;

asifIcouldbeathieforarobber."

Shestopped,consideringinwhatwayshecouldbestgetsomethingoutofhim.

Theysayherethatalldependsontheadvocate,"

shebegan."

Apetitionshouldbehandedin,onlytheysayit'

sexpensive."

Yes,mostcertainly,"

Ihavealreadyspokentoanadvocate."

Nomoneyoughttobespared;

itshouldbeagoodone,"

Ishalldoallthatispossible."

Theyweresilent,andthenshesmiledagaininthesameway.

AndIshouldliketoaskyou...alittlemoneyifyoucan...notmuch;

tenroubles,Idonotwantmore,"

shesaid,suddenly.

Yes,yes,"

Nekhludoffsaid,withasenseofconfusion,andfeltforhispurse.

Shelookedrapidlyattheinspector,whowaswalkingupanddowntheroom."

Don'

tgiveitinfrontofhim;

he'

dtakeitaway."

Nekhludofftookouthispurseassoonastheinspectorhadturnedhisback;

buthadnotimetohandherthenotebeforetheinspectorfacedthemagain,sohecrusheditupinhishand.

Thiswomanisdead,"

Nekhludoffthought,lookingatthisoncesweet,andnowdefiled,puffyface,litupbyanevilglitterintheblack,squintingeyeswhichwerenowglancingatthehandinwhichheheldthenote,thenfollowingtheinspector'

smovements,andforamomenthehesitated.Thetempterthathadbeenspeakingtohiminthenightagainraiseditsvoice,tryingtoleadhimoutoftherealmofhisinnerintotherealmofhisouterlife,awayfromthequestionofwhatheshoulddotothequestionofwhattheconsequenceswouldbe,andwhatwouldhepractical.

Youcandonothingwiththiswoman,"

saidthevoice;

youwillonlytieastoneroundyourneck,whichwillhelptodrownyouandhinderyoufrombeingusefultoothers.

Isitnotbettertogiveherallthemoneythatishere,saygood-bye,andfinishwithherforever?

whisperedthevoice.

Butherehefeltthatnow,atthisverymoment,somethingmostimportantwastakingplaceinhissoul--thathisinnerlifewas,asitwere,waveringinthebalance,sothattheslightesteffortwouldmakeitsinktothissideortheother.AndhemadethiseffortbycallingtohisassistancethatGodwhomhehadfeltinhissoulthedaybefore,andthatGodinstantlyresponded.Heresolvedtotellhereverythingnow--atonce.

Katusha,Ihavecometoaskyoutoforgiveme,andyouhavegivenmenoanswer.Haveyouforgivenme?

Willyoueverforgiveme?

Shedidnotlistentohim,butlookedathishandandattheinspector,andwhenthelatterturnedshehastilystretchedoutherhand,graspedthenote,andhiditunderherbelt.

sodd,whatyouaresayingthere,"

shesaid,withasmileofcontempt,asitseemedtohim.

Nekhludofffeltthattherewasinhersoulonewhowashisenemyandwhowasprotectingher,suchasshewasnow,andpreventinghimfromgettingatherheart.But,strangetosay,thisdidnotrepelhim,butdrewhimnearertoherbysomefresh,peculiarpower.Heknewthathemustwakenhersoul,thatthiswasterriblydifficult,buttheverydifficultyattractedhim.Henowfelttowardsherashehadneverfelttowardsheroranyoneelsebefore.Therewasnothingpersonalinthisfeeling:

hewantednothingfromherforhimself,butonlywishedthatshemightnotremainasshenowwas,thatshemightawakenandbecomeagainwhatshehadbeen.

Katusha,whydoyouspeaklikethat?

Iknowyou;

Irememberyou--andtheolddays